I need a Literary Agent

“All I want for Christmas is…”

In the case that you haven’t read my other posts, let me make something abundantly clear; I like to write.  I like to read.  And I want to become an author.  But in order to do that, to become a published author and move myself one step closer to fulfilling my childhood dream of going toe-to-toe with Stephen King, I need a literary agent.

He kinda looks like he should be in a Stephen King book.

Well, to be fair, I don’t need a literary agent.  I could self-publish.  I could go straight to the publishers.  I could just give up entirely, get a 9-to-5 job, marry, have 2.4 children, retire, die, and join the ranks of the Skeleton War.  But that isn’t what I want to do; I’m compelled to strive for something different, and if I’m going to do that, I need a literary agent.

It’s general consensus in the publishing business that most publishing houses will, at worst, ignore any unsolicited submissions, or, at best, hand them off to some unpaid intern as charity kitty litter.  But with an agent (or a substantial enough online following) the publishing houses are more lenient about hearing what it is you have to say.  Sure, I could be like Andy Weir  and get super-lucky and have my self-published novel top the Amazon charts, but that isn’t likely to happen.  I could also be like Frank Herbert and take my over-sized debut work to an automobile-repair manual publisher, but I don’t think I want to do that either.

I’m not touching that.

So I’m in the market of trying to find an agent.  If you’re reading this and happen to know any literary agents currently looking for clients, please send them my way.  Or, even better, if you are a literary agent, stop reading and hit that “Contact Me” button at the top.  Any interest is appreciated, because in this cutthroat world of fiction publishing, you can never oversell yourself.

I suppose I should probably explain why I think I deserve a literary agent, anyway.  For one, I like to think I’m pretty good at writing, and for two, my novel is already finished.  After working on it for about two years or something like that, I finished the rough draft, edited that once, and then edited it again.  I now have what I suppose you could call the second draft of my novel.  If I want to contact an agent, I had better already have something ready to go, or my email is going in the spam bin.  But I’ve got my manuscript, and I’m ready to get crackin’.

Someday you might even be able to read the novel’s opening on this very blog.

Most agents tend to focus on certain genres of fiction or nonfiction, and while there are so many literary agencies out there, not every one of them is going to be for me. For example, my novel is a Gothic-horror historical fantasy novel that I call Spectral Crown, and it’s in a similar vein to Dracula, or to a lesser extent, Castlevania.  There’s not a huge horror market already, since Stephen King basically owns that corner, and probably an even smaller market for German medieval light fantasy that happens to have heavy horror elements.  I have to be very thorough with finding as many literary agents as possible, because finding one that might want to take a chance on my novel will be a tough time.

At the moment I’m manually going through my semi-outdated copy of Writer’s Market 2016 to see what agencies they recommend, and though it’s slow going, I’ve got a few pretty good leads.  Or at least I hope I do, because once I’m through all the agencies there I have no idea where to go next.

I tried to find an image of Writer’s Market but Google gave me this unnatural thing instead.  Happy reading.

Something I’m kind of betting on is that I can market my novel as Young Adult.  As loathe as I am to step into the same territory as every cheap Hunger Games or Divergent or Eragon knockoff, the numbers don’t lie, and YA is the most profitable market. I love what I’ve written, and think that it’s a story worth telling, but I’m also willing to swallow my pride and let it be sold as a YA novel if it means I get to break into the publishing world.

Technically, I probably wouldn’t have to change anything in the novel to have it be considered YA.  I didn’t think of it as YA when I wrote it, but it has a lot of the hallmarks; an early-twenties protagonist, action sequences, romance, vampires, and magical powers. I think I’m just unwilling to come to the realization that I accidentally wrote a YA novel, because I don’t read YA novels.  I read literary works.  But literary works don’t sell; YA sells.  It sells a lot.  And it isn’t like I consider my novel to be particularly “literary” anyway.  It’s horror-fantasy.  I know it isn’t winning the Nobel Literature Prize; I just don’t like YA.

But then again, Bob Dylan won and then refused the ceremony for a Nobel Literature Prize, so who knows.

With the holidays swiftly approaching, if I could have my Christmas tree and eat it too I’d hope to find a literary agent that can get me a publisher willing to take a look at my work.  Maybe they publisher will read it and say, “Hey, this would be a great YA novel as it is,” and I won’t have to compromise my artistic integrity in order to get access to that magical realm of ill-defined main characters who happen to be the over-powered and arbitrarily-designated Chosen One.

And then when I have some real publishing experience and get my foot in the door, they can’t say no when I tell them about my actual plans for a four-novel YA series revolving around family drama on a rural farm plagued by demons. Today, YA fantasy, tomorrow, the world.

I’m talking to you, mystery agent.

3 thoughts on “I need a Literary Agent”

  1. I’ve read your unedited book and am now reading the edited book and I love it! I’d publish it. But then again, I’m your mom. I’d publish the book you wrote in second grade.

  2. I so strongly want your book to get published, and I have since I read the unedited version. I’m not even into gothic/medieval books, but I could not put yours down!

  3. I would love an opportunity to read your book, I am sure it is thoughtful, interesting and well written! There is nothing wrong with YA, I enjoy books written by experts in the topic, they are more authentic! A YA series written by an actual young adult, now that is a novel idea!!!

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